Saturday, October 14, 2006

Home Schooled

A while back, I started a special project which caused me to spend a lot of time at the computer. It was a project I had been thinking about for years. The computer time seemed like a small price to pay. What I didn’t realize was I would need to learn a few new computer programs. Fortunately, some computer projects at work helped get me ready.

As I started the project, I realized the computer issue could be handled in a variety of ways. First, I could pay someone to do. While not a bad option, I had no idea who that would be. Secondly, I could ask my wife for help, she teaches technology. Char is a great teacher but Ralph is a poor student. As I debated this option, a slogan from the sixties popped into my head, ‘Make Love, Not War’. I ruled this option out rather quickly. So, I went with option number three, I would teach myself. Yes, that’s right, I was going to be home schooled.

Home schooling is hard work especially if you have a poor student, and I am a poor student. Often I would find myself uttering a few choice words and stomping out to the garage. Occasionally I would catch myself talking (if not yelling) at the computer.

But, even though they were short lived, there were moments of victory. I had spent most of the day in front of the computer teaching myself how to do headers, footers and page numbers. That night I jumped up and proclaimed victory. Char just stared at me before saying, “Is that what you have been working on all day? I taught that to my class in four minutes". Some people are just showoffs.

Well, the project is done and report cards have come out. The project is good but I got a D in class. I should have had a B but marked myself down for excessive use of profanity and consuming alcoholic beverages on school grounds.


Blogger Aravis said...

Three cheers for Ralph! You persisted in the face of all obstacles and taught yourself something new. That's no easy feat, and you are to be congratulated. :0)

As for the use of profanity and the need to walk away, I had the same problem yesterday while working out some browser issues. I could totally relate. My carpenter was having trouble with a particular spot and was also using colorful terms. I said I was going to throw the computer out the window and he said he was going to throw the wood in! Thankfully nothing was thrown either way and all was eventually resolved on this end as well. *G*

12:19 PM  
Blogger Rachel said...

Sounds like you might ought to have asked Char for a little advice Ralph. It might have saved some time! Glad you won it over and got it done. I'm not a very good student of technology either.

7:03 PM  
Anonymous Jerry said...

Please tell me that you know how to type. Whenever I have to teach someone on the computer, and they hunt and peck on the keyboard, I think my head is going to explode.

You were probably wise not to ask Char, or you might have had an ESC key mark on your forehead where she hit you with the keyboard.

Congratulations, Ralph!

8:39 PM  
Blogger Cliff Morrow said...

Ralph I can't wait to see the yield of this project.
Wireless keyboards were made so that you can throw them without injuring any of your other equipment.

8:15 AM  
Blogger 1 plus twins said...

congrats to you!! you should be proud that you did it on your own. did you give yourself a gold star!! lol

9:53 AM  
Blogger Rhodent said...

Kudos to you Ralphie!

9:30 PM  
Blogger Dan said...

You can find junk computers in peoples trash by the curb all the time. Pick a few up. When you get angry with the computer, go to the garage and smash one with a golf club. You can take out 2 frustrations at once. Also, another fun one to do with the keyboard is break it over your knee. The keys go everywhere. If you do it over a wood floor, it sounds better.

7:13 AM  

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