Sunday Funnies
We have learned to live with ‘automated answering machines’ as a part of modern life. But, have you wondered what it would be like if God decided to install an automated answering system?
Imagine praying and hearing this: "Thank you for calling My Father's House. Please select one of the following options:
* Press 1 for Requests
* Press 2 for Thanksgiving
* Press 3 for Complaints
* Press 4 for All Other Inquiries."
What if God used the familiar excuse?
"I'm sorry, all of our angels are busy helping others right now. However, your prayer is important to us and will be answered in the order it was received, so please stay on the line."
Can you imagine hearing this: “If you would like to speak to:
* Gabriel, Press 1
* Michael, Press 2
* For a directory of other angels, Press 3
* If you'd like to hear King David sing a psalm while you are holding, please press 4.
* To find out if a loved one is in Heaven, Press 5, enter his or her social security number, then press the pound key."
Fortunately the one we will never hear is:
"This office is closed for the weekend in observance of a religious holiday. Please pray again Monday after 9:30 am. If you need emergency assistance when this office is closed, contact your local pastor."
Imagine praying and hearing this: "Thank you for calling My Father's House. Please select one of the following options:
* Press 1 for Requests
* Press 2 for Thanksgiving
* Press 3 for Complaints
* Press 4 for All Other Inquiries."
What if God used the familiar excuse?
"I'm sorry, all of our angels are busy helping others right now. However, your prayer is important to us and will be answered in the order it was received, so please stay on the line."
Can you imagine hearing this: “If you would like to speak to:
* Gabriel, Press 1
* Michael, Press 2
* For a directory of other angels, Press 3
* If you'd like to hear King David sing a psalm while you are holding, please press 4.
* To find out if a loved one is in Heaven, Press 5, enter his or her social security number, then press the pound key."
Fortunately the one we will never hear is:
"This office is closed for the weekend in observance of a religious holiday. Please pray again Monday after 9:30 am. If you need emergency assistance when this office is closed, contact your local pastor."
posted by Ralph at 5:30 PM
6 Comments:
What a fascinating idea. Thank God it will never be.
I just love this!! I'm going to copy it and send it to lots of family and friends.
Thanks for sharing and have a wonderfully blessed new year!
Good stuff Ralph. Where ya been? I was afraid the snow man got you.
Would he ever get peed off and say "go to Hell?"
Stay warm, Ralph, and stay nice.
..
What an interesting concept Ralph!! Thank God that God doesn't use technology....in that way anyhow!!
Yeah. And it won't ever get canceled due to severe weather!
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