Saturday, December 19, 2009

My Christmas Story

Originally posted in 2007

(Char and I want to wish all my blogging friends a very Merry Christmas. I also want to thank you for the comments you have left throughout the year and for the stories you have shared on your site – those have been nice gifts.)

Ah, Christmas. That time of year when young children go to bed on Christmas Eve knowing Santa Claus will find their house and leave countless gifts. Every noise they hear is reindeer landing on the roof followed by Santa placing presents under the tree. But, it wasn’t always so. Only a few people know how Santa Claus almost ruined Christmas.

I was perhaps six or seven years old. One of my sisters was born and I think my brother was as well, but he was young.

Following dinner, my Dad told Mom he had to run to a few errands and would be back shortly. I remember my mom smiling at him and telling him to hurry home – after all, it was Christmas Eve.

Mom asked my sister and me to stay in the kitchen and tell her what we wanted for Christmas. This is an important topic for a kid so we were more than happy to stay and talk.

We were going down our mental list of what we wanted for Christmas and my mom was dragging out the conversation with thought provoking question like why did we want a certain gift and what would we do with it. And that’s when it happened. . . .my sister let out a blood-curling scream and pointed at the window. I saw it and screamed - two eyes and a beard staring at us through the window.

I ran. My sister followed. We ran into the bedroom and slammed the door. My sister hid in the closet, not knowing the safest place in the house was underneath the bed up against the wall. That’s where I was.

There was more screaming and crying and then the bedroom door opened ever so slowly. My mom told us to come out and there standing next to her was. . . . Santa Claus!

Forget all those Christmas specials you’ve been watching – this was not a happy reunion between Santa and the kids. Questions like, “Why are you here already?” “Why were you looking in the kitchen window?” And, yes, even “Where are your reindeer?” All questions that needed to be answered before warming up to the guy in the red suit with the beady eyes.

Finally, peace was made and my sister and I told Santa what we wanted for Christmas. There was no way were we getting close to him. We told Santa what we wanted from across the room.

Santa left and a few minutes later, my dad returned. Boy, did we have a story to tell him.


Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Italian Food

There is an Italian restaurant close to our house. It has great spaghetti.

Char and I went there tonight, it was ‘All You Can Eat’ night. Their special is a great deal for us. You get soup or salad, a large plate of spaghetti, two large pieces of meat (we usually get a sausage and a meatball), garlic bread, and a pitcher of great tasting sauce for about eight dollars. They will bring you all the spaghetti you want.

We usually get the special and tell the server to just bring us a to go box. We know we’re not going to be able to eat all they bring out, much less ask for more. We usually leave full and with a pound or two of leftovers.

The place isn’t fancy. If you’re trying to impress someone, avoid this place. But, it’s clean, the food is good, and you rarely have to wait. It’s a nice place to take friends and family – except of course Tiffany. Even though we started at an early age, we were never able to teach her how to eat spaghetti.

Okay, maybe we did - this picture was taken in 1986.

Saturday, December 12, 2009

Sunday Funnies

A motorist was driving in the country when he came upon a priest and a rabbi standing on the shoulder of the road. Next to them was a sign that read "Turn Around. The End Is Near."

The motorist didn't like be preached at, so he rolled down the window and yelled, "Mind your own business, you religious nuts!"

A few seconds later, they heard tires screech, then a splash.

The rabbi turned to the priest and said, "I told you we should've just written, 'Bridge Out.'"

Monday, December 07, 2009

Cold Feet

DOR (Daughter of Ralph – a.k.a. Tiffany) and I do not agree on the story behind this picture. Back then, she was young and her memory not as trained at capturing the details as mine. Here’s what REALLY happened back in 1992 when this picture was taken.

Waking up in the night I laid in bed sensing something was wrong. I didn’t know what but I had that feeling that something was seriously out of place. Getting out of the warm, comfortable, bed I started looking around to see what was causing the uneasy feeling. Walking downstairs, I spotted the front door open! I checked and double-checked it before going to bed! Heat was pouring outside and everybody outside could come in. Something is wrong.

I closed the door and then made a rapid sweep thought the rooms on the main level of the house. No intruders, nothing out of place. I ran upstairs to check. Nathan was sleeping soundly. DOR was . . . . GONE!! Somebody had broken into the house and taken her!

By now, Char had joined in the search for our beloved daughter. She opened the door and looked outside. There our precious little girl was wandering aimlessly around the backyard in the snow.

DOR was a sleep walker. Numerous times, she had wandered into our room in the middle of the night to tell us something that made absolutely no sense. We had found her sleep walking downstairs. Often we would find her sleeping walking in her room or the hallway. Once, after letting out a piercing scream we found her asleep standing on the bed having a fistfight with an imaginary girl.

But, this was the first time she had gone outside. We brought her into the house, warmed her up and woke her up. Noticing how red her feet were did cause some concern. It also caused me to grab my camera, take her back outside, and get a picture.

Now DOR’s version of this event is she was playing in the back yard and her feet got cold. I’m sure the passage of time, seventeen years to be exact, has distorted her memory. So there you have it, DOR’s version or the truth – you decide. Either way the important thing is - she still has ten toes.

Saturday, December 05, 2009

Sunday Funnies

Two missionaries in Africa were apprehended by a tribe of very hostile cannibals who put them in a large pot of water, built a huge fire under it, and left them there.

A few minutes later, one of the missionaries started to laugh uncontrollably.

The other missionary couldn't believe it! He said, ''What's wrong with you? We're being boiled alive! They're gonna eat us! What could possibly be funny at a time like this?''

The other missionary replied, ''I just peed in the soup!''

Wednesday, December 02, 2009

The Complete Set

A few years ago a fast food restaurant offered Holiday glasses. You could get one with each visit throughout the holiday season and were encouraged to return often to collect the complete set. Char and I received a set or two as Christmas presents. They are nice glasses and we still have and use them.

The complete set concept evidently caught on and other businesses started doing the same thing. I was finally able to complete my set of Morrow Kennel cups. I now have both a white and a red one. Prior to this, I only had the white ones. As near as I can tell, we had traveled 3,600 miles over the past year or so to complete the set.

I also collected another set, the youngest members of the Morrow clan. On the left is Georgia and on the right is Cooper. We enjoyed Thanksgiving with the Morrow’s this year and as usual, it was a lot of fun. As usual, no one went hungry. They really put on a feast and the kids provided the entertainment.