Cold Steel
I’ve never been a big shaving fan. However, over the decades I have grown accustom to it. There is something wrong with waking up in the morning, being groggy, and pulling a piece of cold steel across your throat.
Early in 2005, I wrote about my frustration with spaghetti sauce. You can read about it here. Now it seems that even shaving is going down that path.
Yesterday I was at the pharmacy of one of those large discount stores. I thought while there it would be a good time to get more razor blades. Sounds pretty simple doesn’t it? Well, you cannot believe the number of blades they are putting on razors these days. When I started shaving, we had a razor with a blade. That's it - one blade. I spilled a lot of blood with that razor.
Then all the changes started. First, we had the Plus razor. This was a nice little single bladed razor with a conditioning strip. The purpose of that conditioning strip was to give you a cleaner, closer shave. I never was able to figure out if that conditioning strip worked but hey, like I said it was morning and most likely I was still half asleep.
Then things began to take off. The Trac II was introduced. A razor with two blades. The Sensor 3 followed. That’s right, a three bladed razor. This was when I thought razors had maxed out and this would be the end so I bought one. Evidently, a lot of other people did too. This must have made all the marketers rejoice and proclaim, “Hey if they like three blades they’ll love four!” Hence, the Quattro 4, a four bladed razor was unveiled. I'm sure this caused a great deal of fanfare somewhere. But, yesterday, there it was - the latest and greatest. A five-blade razor with of all things, that stupid conditioning strip! It's called Fusion.
Nathan, my son, was with me and even he was amazed. He too remembered when three blades was a big deal. He’s not that old, things shouldn’t change this fast.
So, I have to make a decision. Do I just quit shaving altogether or do I start going to the gym and working out so I’ll be ready to drag a razor with twenty blades and, of course, a conditioning strip across my throat first thing in the morning?
Early in 2005, I wrote about my frustration with spaghetti sauce. You can read about it here. Now it seems that even shaving is going down that path.
Yesterday I was at the pharmacy of one of those large discount stores. I thought while there it would be a good time to get more razor blades. Sounds pretty simple doesn’t it? Well, you cannot believe the number of blades they are putting on razors these days. When I started shaving, we had a razor with a blade. That's it - one blade. I spilled a lot of blood with that razor.
Then all the changes started. First, we had the Plus razor. This was a nice little single bladed razor with a conditioning strip. The purpose of that conditioning strip was to give you a cleaner, closer shave. I never was able to figure out if that conditioning strip worked but hey, like I said it was morning and most likely I was still half asleep.
Then things began to take off. The Trac II was introduced. A razor with two blades. The Sensor 3 followed. That’s right, a three bladed razor. This was when I thought razors had maxed out and this would be the end so I bought one. Evidently, a lot of other people did too. This must have made all the marketers rejoice and proclaim, “Hey if they like three blades they’ll love four!” Hence, the Quattro 4, a four bladed razor was unveiled. I'm sure this caused a great deal of fanfare somewhere. But, yesterday, there it was - the latest and greatest. A five-blade razor with of all things, that stupid conditioning strip! It's called Fusion.
Nathan, my son, was with me and even he was amazed. He too remembered when three blades was a big deal. He’s not that old, things shouldn’t change this fast.
So, I have to make a decision. Do I just quit shaving altogether or do I start going to the gym and working out so I’ll be ready to drag a razor with twenty blades and, of course, a conditioning strip across my throat first thing in the morning?
posted by Ralph at 8:01 PM
10 Comments:
You poor guys! It must be tough having to shave day after day after day....
Heck, in the wintertime I can get away with hardly shaving my legs at all, since I wear jeans or slacks most of the time.
Ralph,
My Dad is on a tirade and is going to take the rest of the 5 pack of double blade disposable razors back to the store and tell them that they better quit selling them because they ain't worth a damn! The only problem is that I bought them, and I don't remember where.
I feel your pain.
I think I'd be tempted to quit shaving! Very funny post Ralph... I have had similar thoughts when looking at all of the selections these days. I am sure that MANY men share your exasperation.
You can buy a Norelco electric razor with a trimmer at WalMart for less than thirty dollars.
No more blades to buy that way. I hardly cut myself anymore either with the electric.
..
Soon they'll decide that Less is More after all, and bring back the New! Improved! Straight Edge razor so you can Ginsu your throat before breakfast...
Funny stuff Ralph! It does get confusing doesn't it?
How about growing a beard? That would make a lot of good blogging and comments! Save money on blades too. Just a thought.....
Meanwhile, I hope you aren't a free bleeder!!
If they really want to sell blades, then let them invent a blade--or blades--that give you a nice, relaxing facial massage as soon as you're done. Wouldn't that be nice first thing in the morning?
Really good post, Ralph. Funny.
Hahahaha - great post! Your ending did me in. :) My husband is so frustrated (with the shaver). I have very delicate skin so he also has to search high and low for shaving cream that I'm not allergic to, or we can't smooch. I could write a post on all the scented "non scented" products.
I know what you're going thru Buddy. The last time I looked for a razor at Walmart, it took me about 15 minutes to decide.
Cut it out Ralph!!!
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