Sunday Funnies

This may come as a surprise to many of you but Las Vegas has more Catholic churches than casinos.

Not surprisingly, some worshipers at Sunday service will give casino chips rather than cash when the offering is taken.

The churches receive chips from many different casinos so they have devised a method to cash in the offering. The churches send all their collected chips to a nearby monastery for sorting. After the chips are sorted, they are taken to the casinos of origin and cashed in.

This is all done by a special group known as the chip monks.

Sound Advice

I read the post, “Preaching and Hypocrisy” again. Then I sat back and thought, “You know that is good advice – even if I did write it.” I decided to practice what I preached.


It resulted in Homespun Headlines 2008, my fourth book. The back cover says in part, “Between the covers of this book you can catch up on history, keep up on current events, and even learn what the future holds. There is truly no other book like it.”

You can view the 2008 version here, the entire series here, or none of them here.

These books are becoming easier and easier to produce and are a great way of retaining many stories and events to pass on.

Sunday Funnies

A Preacher was seated next to a cowboy on a flight to Texas. After the plane took off, the cowboy asked for a whiskey and soda, which was brought and placed before him.

The flight attendant asked the preacher if he would like a drink. Appalled, the preacher replied indignantly, “I'd rather be tied up and taken advantage of by women of ill-repute, than let liquor touch my lips.”

The cowboy handed his drink back to the flight attendant and said, “Me too, I didn't know we had a choice.”

(Thanks to Paul - Writing From The Hip)

Little Ralph's

This was the headline of the paper today. It’s startling as well as hard to comprehend. The newspaper did a good job of trying to explain how much money that is. But, I can’t envision a stack of pennies circling the earth 119 times.

I have a hard time comprehending any number with twelve zero’s behind it. So, using my big button calculator, I created my own math equation.

If I were to be cloned and each clone was paid what I am currently making there would be more than 44,778,000 “little Ralph’s” running around. To break it down even further, “little Ralph’s” could populate the state where I live ten times (a good thing if it’s an election year).

I like myself and have absolutely no doubt a few more Ralph clones sprinkled throughout the country would be a good thing. But, seriously the thought of having 44 million clones of me – well, that scares even me.

Now for the important question - do you have time to read 44,778,000 more blogs?

User Friendly

For the last few weeks, I have been making some decisions that have upset many people.

Today I was ‘interfacing’ with a group of people and was told, “You know, if you were a piece of computer software you’d have ‘Not User Friendly’ written all over your forehead”.

The statement made me laugh but it also made me realize not everything in life is a popularity contest - like the election.

Sunday Funnies

Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, 'Why is the bride dressed in white?''

The mother replied,"Because white is the color of happiness, and today is the happiest day of her life."

The little girl thought about this for a moment then said, 'So why is the groom wearing black?"

(Thanks to Rachel)

Clarifying

I take pride in my hair - both of them. So, I was a little disappointed in Char’s response this morning.

I looked at Char and said, “Notice anything different?” She glanced at me and replied, “No”.

I asked her to take a closer look and slowly turned around. She said, “No – what’s different?” I wanted to ask again but her tone indicated I shouldn’t push my luck.

“I started using a different shampoo,” I replied. “It clarifies, thickens, and brings out the natural beauty of my hair with noticeable results after just one application.”

Char was still laughing when I noticed the $1.52 shampoo gave my almost bald head a shine like never before.

Super

That was quite the game yesterday. Whether your team won or not both teams are to be commended for a great game. It was a fun game to watch.

But, it’s not all about football. We had quite the feast going at the same time. There was a crock-pot of chili, a cheese and cracker plate, a few chicken wings, chips and dip, lettuce wraps, a rack of smoked ribs, and the old stand by – a pitcher of ice tea.

A super game complete with super food.